Installed at last in my coachman’s seat, high and lifted up above the street I clung fast to the reins and cracked my whip with a resounding snap over the horses’ backs. Then in a flash we were off! We seemed to be flying over the ground as houses, trees, clouds and sky whizzed past us with the speed of light, and before long a wee dot appeared on the horizon. The dot uncoiled itself like a waking serpent, and slowly stretched its body upwards and outwards, shape shifting into a magnificent tear-shaped palace adorned with many exotic domes. As we drew up on the driveway, a footman in scarlet livery approached the door to help Cindy down and escort her inside… and then within a few short moments she was gone.

One hour passed, then two. All the while I was getting more and more hungry, but despite the lavish banquet prepared for royal guests at the palace, no one offered anything to the coachmen waiting outside. I mean, really, what kind of class distinction was this? After all, servants are people too and none of us live on air, do we! However I was eventually distracted by a succession of rather lovely young ladies arriving for the festivities, as a result of which the remaining hours till midnight slipped by very much more pleasantly.

Then before I knew it, I became aware of a figure clothed in white hurrying towards me, and realised with a start that it was Cindy. As I opened the door to let her back in, I couldn’t help noticing how her face shone with joy.

‘Oh, Grumpkin, I danced with Prince Frank all night, and I really think he likes me!’ she said, pausing to share her excitement. ‘We talked for hours about so many things, especially horses, which I love. His favourite mare was refusing to eat, so he took me to see her. I could tell right away what was wrong, she was missing her foal that had been taken away to be hand reared. So when he heard this he gave the order for it to be returned to her, and in no time at all she was back to her normal self and eating again. Now the prince says I’m the best horse whisperer in the whole kingdom!’

‘That’s great, I’m really glad for you, Cindy!’ I said. ‘But it’s nearly midnight, and we need to get a move on if I’m going to get you home before the magic stops.’

‘Of course, Grumpkin, we can talk properly later,’ she said happily, climbing in and reclining against the soft upholstery.

So with that I jumped onto my seat, grabbed the reins, and snapped the whip sharply to launch the carriage on its homeward journey.

Well, it seemed that no sooner had we departed the palace grounds than we were already pulling up outside Swindlerella’s house. And then, as if in a puff of smoke, all of a sudden we found our bodies restored to their former shape and returned to the kitchen. I can tell you, fans, that was some shock to the system, and naturally quite exhausting! It’s no wonder, then, that I went straight to bed and fell into a deep sleep which lasted till the evening of the next day. But unknown to myself, while I was sleeping someone else was wide awake and brewing up some witching herbs in an old tea kettle till their juices turned deep blue. And being that I wasn’t around to see the events that ensued, the next part of our story is taken up by our fly-on-the-wall witness, Bertie the Bluebottle.

‘Bzzz, hi everyone – I’m Bertie your flying news reporter, working undercover as just one of the many thousands of plain and ordinary house flies bugging homes like yours right across the globe. Well, what a story this izzz, isn’t it! What I can tell you from the start is that this Swindlerella woman is definitely not what she seemzzz – not that she seems that great to begin with, of course, but what we’re talking about here is really nothing short of pure evil… and if you have any doubts about that, just hear all the thingzzz she did while Grumpkin was asleep!

‘For starters, what on earth was she concocting in that kettle? Whatever it was, it smelled terrible and came out of the spout inky blue. Then as I watched her, she poured the stuff into a thick jug to cool, waving her arms over it with circular motions and muttering some kind of strange incantation. After this she transferred it into a glass, then went over to the oven where she switched it for an identical glass of blue liquid that had been hidden inside it. Finally she took this identical glass and stashed it at the back of a cupboard in the next room. What was she up to? Well, whatever it was, it was clearly bad newzzz, wasn’t it, so I naturally decided to track her every move till I got to the bottom of it.

‘But to my great frustration, for the rest of the night and most of the next day, nothing unusual happened to anyone in the house. I soon began to wonder if I was wrong about Swindlerella. As implausible as it seemed, perhaps after all she was just a harmless eccentric? I still kept up the surveillance, though, and given what was about to unfold, it was a jolly good job I did – because shortly before six in the evening, everything suddenly changed.

‘The witch locked Cindy in the kitchen and retired to the living room with her two daughterzzz, one of whom was done up to the nines and made to look like a pop star. I think her name was Dazey, or something like that. Anyway, the other one, called Dulley, was in her normal clothes with no makeup or anything. That was when Swindlerella went back to the cupboard where she had hidden the glass of blue potion… and while I looked on, just as the clock struck six, she gave it to Dulley to drink.

‘Well, the transformation was instant! Instead of jeanzzz and a sweater, the teenager was now clad from head to foot in a beautiful white satin dress. A diamond tiara gleamed in her hair, and her face was hidden from view by a close fitting silver mask, studded with jewels. Falling from her shoulders was a magnificent purple cloak, and as my eyes journeyed downwards, a pair of glass slippers appeared out of the air and magically grew till they swallowed her feet. Then quick as a blink the youngster vanished!

‘This was such a shock that I flew all over the house trying to find her, but to no avail. By the time I got back to the living room, Dazey was gone, too, and her mother was sitting eyes closed in an armchair, mumbling another incantation. And then I remembered Cindy! Was she still in the kitchen? Was she okay? Zooming off to look for her, I somehow squeezzzed myself into the next room through the crack under the door. As I buzzed around for a bit to get my bearings, it took a moment or two to make out exactly what I was seeing in the dark. Then little by little my focus homed in on a girl stretched out on the floor.

‘Well, I was devastated, wasn’t I! I spent the next few minutes circling round and round in a panic, wondering what in the world I should do to revive her. But of course there’s very little a fly really can do in that situation, so I finally had to settle for watching over her from my elevated viewpoint on the table. Thus it was that while I stood guard over Cindy in the kitchen, Grumpkin the coachman drove Dulley to the prince’s ball. And this, dear friendzzz, is his account of what happened next…’

Yes, fans, it’s me again – and I can tell you right now, I’m absolutely livid! As that girl got into my carriage I was already beginning to sense something amiss, but couldn’t quite put my finger on it. Then after we drew up outside the palace, a footman opened the door to escort her inside, and something about that just didn’t seem right. My eyes followed her as she waddled across the courtyard, yanking up her dress on both sides so it wouldn’t trip her up. Then at last came the moment of truth. As she eventually lost her footing and fell, swearing loudly while three more footmen ran to her aid, I felt a most horrible lurch inside. Surely this couldn’t be Cindy! I mean, Cindy was such an elegant, educated person, and she’d never ever been heard to swear… so that was when I was forced to ask some serious questions:

If this wasn’t her, then where in heaven’s name was she, and who was this shameless impostor?

Well, as to what transpired later in the palace, I’ve been reliably informed by three uniformed members of the Wasp Police Force that Prince Frank did indeed dance with this individual, who looked in every way like the young girl he fell in love with the night before. However he is reported to have later confided in friends that her voice was not as he remembered it, and more baffling still, that she now seemed to have a complete lack of empathy with horses.

Meanwhile, with only sixty five seconds to spare till midnight, I watched as Cindy’s impersonator puffed and hobbled her way back to the carriage minus her right shoe. There was just time for me to slam the door after her, swing myself onto my seat and then grab the reins, before we were off!

Next moment – in what for all the world felt like just a split second of time – there I was in the kitchen again, as if absolutely nothing had happened. I was back in my hole in the wall. The mice were back in theirs. The watermelon was back on the table, and only one thing in the scene had changed…

The girl who we knew as Cindy was nowhere at all to be found.

To be continued…